Mister Sandman, Bring Me a Dream

so, for my birthday this year, my oldest sister got me the first three books in the Sandman series.

all of these pictures are backwards because they're from my webcam. DEAL WITH IT!

i've been wanting these books for AGES! but the full 2 volume set costs $100 each and i'm broke as shit. so when i opened these up i seriously started crying i was so damn happy. i love these books so damn much you guys!

love

i just...

*sniiiiiiiiiiiff*

...sorry, i'll stop now...

everything i'm about to say about this series has been said before and better, because anyone involved in the comic book/ graphic novel community knows Sandman. or at least, they should because i really think it's up there with The Watchmen in terms of influential graphic novels.

ANYWAYS! getting back to what actually matters! if you've never heard of the Sandman books, maybe you've heard of the guy who wrote them: eccentric British dude, Neil Gaiman!

look at that crazy dude with that dog!

he likes Cthulhu 

if you still have no idea who i'm talking about, why not check out his Wikipedia Article, or his personal blog. He's written such books as Coraline, American Gods,  Stardust, Neverwhere, Anansi Boys, and The Graveyard Book; to name a few. in short, HE IS GODDAMN AMAZING! the man has a beautifully twisted sense of humor and a child-like sense of wonder. he's never afraid to run past the lines of decency, but he does it in such a way that it doesn't feel gratuitous.

ok...enough fangirling about the author, lets look at some of the art. i have the fully recoloured editions. the art is by Sam Kieth, Mike Dringenberg, Malcolm Jones III, Daniel Vozzo, Todd Klein, and Dave McKean [as an artist i think it's necessary to list ALL the artists involved in a project]. to be fair, i have no clue who any of those dudes are, but the result is FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC!

i'm sorry if you can't actually see this

there's a grungy elegance to some parts that are truly beautiful.

if this doesn't make you wanna run out and read comics i don't know what will

then people's heads fall off and melt and you're just like "wtf?!" and you're truly grossed out because of how detailed some of the gore can get

this is right before Morpheus has a rap battle with some lesser demon. seriously.

but then, like, these huge sprawling full page spreads filled with detail and every one of those demons and monsters has personality and a little bit of humor to them.

basically everything about these books is amazing. the main character, Morpheus,

he's like the love child of Gaiman and David Bowie from Labyrinth 

...is the King of Dreams. and that's what the books are about. Morpheus and his siblings and how they try to carry on with their business. Gaiman has a way of writing supernatural characters that makes them feel totally real and plausible. he weaves cultures, legends, and history together so seamlessly. i won't go into detail about the plot of the books since i've only read the three and they are SO worth reading on your own, but i will say this; if you're looking for some meatier graphic novels to get into, this one is well worth your while.

moral of the story:
        Sandman is awesome.
        Neil Gaiman is awesome.
        GO READ SANDMAN RIGHT NOW!

>Mar

The Lion and the Lame

HAH! look at that! i made a witty pun! i win at being funny now, right?

ANYWAYS! i went and saw Twilight: Breaking Dawn: Part II tonight! it was...oh my god, guys, it was the most goddamn ridiculous movie i have EVER seen! and i've seen this!

 those polar bears are sad because they just sat through that shit storm or a documentary

                         

I was instructed by my sisters [who i went to see this with, because FUCK I WOULD NOT PAY FOR THAT SHIT OTHERWISE!] that i was not allowed to make jokes or laugh too loudly at the movie since it was their first time seeing it. for those of you who don't know, there's a big twist at the end of the movie. i already knew said twist because i don't give to flying, golden shits about those shitty-ass books. 

i think the chess pieces have something to do with sex or some shit? i don't know.

i would like to point out some things about this movie, guys.

as most of you know,  Jacob [Bella's ex-pseudo-werewolf-boyfriend, played by Taylor Lautner] FALLS IN LOVE WITH A BABY! Bella and Edward's creepy-ass halfie baby. Let's just all take a minute here. he imprints* [*read: 'FALLS IN LOVE WITH] his Ex-girlfriends crazy mutant baby! you can rationalize that all you want, but he's still in love with an 8 year old. 

#SPOILERSPOILERSPOILERQUITREADINGIFYOUGIVEASHITABOUTTHISFRANCHISE#

they ACTUALLY go the "it was all a dream" route at the end. you know all those trailers with the huge epic battle? yeah. it was all Alice showing the evil lead vampire what would happen if he kept being a flamboyant douche.

THIS MOTHER FUCKER!

look at that crazy bitch!

oh my FUCKING SHIT! this asshole! oh my GOD he has hilarious! he just overacted the hell out of his part. i'd say he almost makes the whole damn thing worth while...though that may very well be the whiskey talking at this point...

....ugh, speaking of which, it's late and i've had a few so i think i'm gonna go to bed. I'm sure i'll make another post about this ridiculousness some other time. a post that is more thought out and cohesive than this. in the mean time

                                                                       HAPPY THANKSGIVING BITCHES!

the apples make it healthy, right?

>Mar